If you have friends that are already married, they would probably say that managing the guest list is the most difficult part of the planning stage. It sounds simple, but somehow, it is something you will consider as the foundation to all aspects of your planning.
Here's a few tips in creating your guest list.
1. List down ALL the people you want to be in your big day
Don't startle. This is just the first step. Just relax and write the names as many as you can. Of course, the list includes the extra, i.e. the friends of your siblings or parents, huge clans and neighbors. It will not hurt to write all of them. If you don't know some names, just indicate a dummy name or a number. Do this activity before you start looking for caterers and other suppliers. This is important, so you have a baseline in your planning. Remember, do not start inviting or sharing the initial list to other people than your partner.
2. Categorize the names according to you or your partner's relationship with the guests
It is helpful to see the number of guests per category. Identify them as immediate family, cousins, colleagues, friends, neighbors, as some. This trick can also save you time when you build the seat plan.
3. Assess the initial list
Evaluate how many guests can you accommodate with your budget. If you can invite everyone in the list, there will be no problem. Otherwise, revisit the list and see
which has many representatives per category. If you have written 50 names under neighbors, may be it is time to remove a few based on how close your relationship is with them. Keep a separate list of those you removed, still according to category, because you will use it in the next step.
If you haven't created your budget yet, read my previous blog:
4. Finalize the list
It is best to send out a "Save the date" invitations to the 2nd draft of the guest list at least 4 months before the wedding. Destination weddings may require at least 8 months, so that your guests may have more time to prepare and book flights. Sending "Save the date" e-cards or printed cards is not mandatory, but it allows your guests to know that they are invited and they have to block their calendars. Otherwise, they have to tell you early on that they cannot make it.
There will always be people who may decline and regret to attend your wedding. Sad to hear, but it is somehow a great news to know the changes earlier in your planning. Replace them with the names who are next on your list.
You should be able to distribute your wedding invitations at least 2 months prior to your wedding day. It is recommended to invite more people (not too many, controlled as possible), as 10% of those who RSVP'd may not really be able to attend due to unfortunate circumstances.
If you haven't created your timeline yet, read my previous blog:
So... what should be written in your invitations?
The front page of your final invitation is similar to a "Save the date" card, but more detailed. It should indicate the date, time of the ceremony, location of the ceremony and the reception. The second page usually bears the names of your entourage. The third and fourth page usually contain the allocated seats of the guest, attire, a map to the venue, and other notes that you want your guests to know ahead of the wedding day i.e. unplugged ceremony, couple's hashtags and the reception program.
Here's a beautiful Cathedral wedding
In a golf course reception
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